Future

I keep looking forward and wondering what my future will hold.  My biggest fear is being old and alone.  I see my Mom's life and know I don't want to go down the same path that she did.  I really hope to find someone to compliment me and be partners in life.  One of the things I dislike a lot is going to things alone and coming back home alone.  I can do it but it doesn't mean I like it.  Went to a play last night and it just feels lonely when you arrive by yourself and then when you come home to an empty house.  I guess I'll get used to it.

Happiness

I'm beginning to think happiness is over rated, or maybe for some but not for others.  I was with friends tonight and I enjoy their company a lot.  One set of friends got married in Dec and had a very nice reception tonight.  I'm happy for them and glad they found one another.  I was around other couples who seem to be very happy,  It's hard since I want to find the person who compliments my life, one who makes me smile and laugh.  I just don't see it happening.  I think I'm ready to have a new person in my life.  I want someone who loves and cherishes me.  Respect is also going to be important.  I may not be the best or brightest but I deserve to be respected.  Lacking in my last relationship so I know I need this in the next one.  I'm so glad for those who have found love in their life but also a bit jealous too